Living an empowered and fulfilling life

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favour all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now."

William Hutchison Murray

Hello and welcome to my newly revamped website Whispers of Wisdom.  I first launched my website in 2014 with a focus on grief and loss.  I was drawn to these topics as my husband, Roy died suddenly of a heart attack in the summer of 2011.  Interestingly, I have been a licensed psychotherapist since 1995 and through the years I had studied and explored a variety of approaches for supporting clients who were dealing with grief and loss.  I had “successfully” worked through the deaths of my parents, a few friends, and many four legged companions.  I felt confident in my ability to handle death and loss.  In the initial months following Roy’s death, I quickly learned that I was not prepared for the emotional and psychological impact of being a widow.  Facing life on my own after almost 25 years of being with my wonderful late husband was daunting. The steps I initially needed to take in order to deal with  the emotional pain and to be on top of the legal responsibilities were unfamiliar, uncomfortable and agonizing. I faltered many times on my journey.

From the onset of creating my website, my intention has been to shed light on what I have learned about grief.  I hope to inspire my readers who are walking the path of grief to cultivate a sense of self-confidence to find their way through the painful aftermath of death and loss.  Ultimately I aspire to encourage others on this path to have faith in themselves and to learn that there is life after loss.  

It has now been 10 years since my husband’s death.  Four years ago, I moved from the beachside community of Santa Barbara to the high deserts of Tucson.  Although I have been writing during the time I have been living in Tucson, I have not published a blog since early 2018.  At the present time, I find myself in a very different chapter of my life and I have new insights to share with my readers.  I invite you to join me on this continuing journey of healing and self discovery.  

Kathleen A. Barry,  PhD

Latest Posts

Listening to Whispers of Wisdom

My late husband Roy would have been 82 on June 3, 2023. The creation of this  website was inspired by the journey of grief I undertook following his sudden death of a heart attack on July 10, 2011.  As I approach the twelfth anniversary of his death, I am reminded of the many painful yet educational lessons…
Read More Listening to Whispers of Wisdom

Letting Go – Part 3

In this next writing, I will begin to  unpack what steps I took to create my new life and identity as a single woman.  I remember reviewing Roy’s death certificate several months after his death.  I noticed that it said he was married to me on the day of his death. Ironically, this is the same day…
Read More Letting Go – Part 3

Letting Go – Part 2

In this next writing, I am continuing with the theme of letting go. During the initial months following Roy’s death, the focus was not only on saying goodbye to his personal effects, it was also about saying goodbye to his physical presence in my daily life.  I needed to understand, without his presence, all of our…
Read More Letting Go – Part 2
letting go

The Journey of Letting Go

A friend was telling me about a widower she has befriended whose wife of 25 years died four years ago. She noticed that his home looks like a shrine to his late wife.  There are many photos placed in special spots throughout the house.  They are platonic friends and she feels attracted to him.  She…
Read More The Journey of Letting Go

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